QM Forum
The Quran => Women => Topic started by: ursimmy on August 20, 2016, 07:52:57 PM
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As salaamu alaikum Brother
Is iddah for women still applicable? In today's date we have advanced technology for pregnancy test.
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Assalamu alaikum Ursimmy,
I know the question is not addressed towards me, but i hope you don't mind i answered.
Yours is an interesting question. I was asked of it many times, mostly by people who wanted to present Islam as an outdated religion, meaning its laws are not needed anymore, since for example for iddat we have pregnancy tests.
I would like you to bear in mind that for each and every law Allah gave us, there is always an infinite wisdom behind it, and the main purpose is the best for us. Who can know what's the best for us more than the One who created us? He knows how He created us so He knows what we need and what works best for us.
With regards to iddat, its purpose is not solely to see if a woman is pregnant or not. Even in ancient times there were methods to determine a woman's pregnancy before her belly could be seen. Its purpose is also the reconciliation of the couple. You see, as the three months go by, as the loss of each other is inevitable, the couple can realize they love each other and can't live without each other. It's the human nature to realize what he/she lost only after the loss. If that is the case, you have three months to recover your loss :) On the other side, a pregnant woman's iddat is until she gives birth. The happiness and love a kid brings to a couple's life can make them reconsider their divorce and be even happier than before, now that they have a kid.
Only in the last century (if i'm not mistaken) can you find in the western countries the laws of divorce that also require husband and wife to live under the same roof for some months before the divorce is finalized, so that the couple can see if they can still work things out. In west such a custom is relatively new, but in the Quran it was ordained 1500 years ago :) no matter how many laws people try, in the end they always come to realize that His laws are the best way of life, and the best way of resolving matters.
I hope i was of help,
Your sister Seraphina
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sister Seraphim the As salaamu alaikum.
If reconciliation is reason you gave,
Then why iddah is not for untouched married women and why it is there for widow??
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Well, for a marriage to be considered marriage, it has to be consummated. Thats what differs the marriage from all other types of kinship. If two people have been under nikah, lived under the same roof and still there was nothing between them strong enough as to consume their marriage, then there is not much left to be saved there :)
As for the widow, thats a period that gives her time to recover from the loss of her spouse, ponder over the future of her and her kids, and to deal with inheritance left from spouse (if any), and so on. Besides, in many countries widows are pressured from their family and close relatives to remarry shorlty after. The Quran doesnt force her to remarry, simply gives her time to think what will she do next. Thank God, in our religion marriage is reccomended but not compulsory.
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Iddat is NOT prescribed for widows. Please see Joseph's article on the subject.
Regards
wanderer
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Peace. And what about this statement of our Lord?
"يَتَرَبَّصْنَ بِأَنْفُسِهِنَّ أَرْبَعَةَ أَشْهُرٍ وَعَشْرًا"
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?
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I don't speak arabic, so I really need you to translate.
Regards
wanderer
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Wanderer, the widow has to wait four months and ten days before being free to remarry if she wishes so. I dont know if its named 'iddat' as well.
Gahaiile, i dont speak arabic so i have no idea what you asked :)
Salam to both of you.
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Waiting for Joseph Islam
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Can we please request that kind forum members always remain conscious of the forum policies.
Ursimmy - Please ask your question and if brother Joseph Islam is able to respond he will. He has numerous other comittments and although he really tries really hard to answer and help us all even given the many of queries he gets, he cannot get to all the queries. Please also check first whether the question has been answered before as no one has time to repeat their responses. For example there are articles and comments already brother Joseph has written. Have you checked all these writings on this topic?
http://quransmessage.com/articles/iddat%20FM3.htm
If you can - please don't 'wait on' answers. Ask your question and if brother Joseph can respond - he will. There is also forum policy 2d to remain conscious of generally.
Gahaiile - The forum states:
1 (e) The default language of this forum is English. The only other language that will be permitted is Arabic with the proviso that an appropriate translation in English is provided.
Please can you ensure that observe this rule going forward please.
Wanderer - Just a gentle request - If you are going to quote brother Joseph or refer to something he has said, please can you provide supporting references. This is also a request also for all readers on the forum. Please see forum policy 2 (j) and (k)
FORUM POLICY
http://quransmessage.com/forum/policy
Thanks everyone!
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Peace. It's from 2:234 (here're some translations of 2:234 (http://www.islamawakened.com/quran/2/234/default.htm)).
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To sister Seraphim
The waiting period prescribed for widows is NOT refered to as 'iddat'.
Regards
Wanderer
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Peace. Do you even know what the word means?
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To my knowledge, it detonates a prescribed waiting period. The term used in verse 2:234 is not 'iddat', and does not even denote the same period of time. Are you trying to ridicule me?
Regards
wanderer
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Peace. Do you know what the word "تَرَبَّصْ" (as used in 2:234) means?
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The term 'tarabbasna' used in verse 2:234 denotes a general waiting, or, more specifically, a mourning period for widows, after which they are allowed to remarry/not remarry, do whatever they want with themselves, as long as they stay within Quranic guidelines.
Regards
wanderer
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Salam Wanderer,
Yeah thats what i was saying previously. It is not iddat, it is a waiting/mourning period and when it ends she is free to do whatever she sees as the best for her life.
Thank God He has given us a time for ourselves, to mourn, to heal, to regain the ability to think clerly again, and then to decide what do we do next with our life. Thats usualy the natural process of someone who has lost her beloved one.
Who understands our needs better than the One who created us (with those needs) :)
Salam to all :)
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Dear All,
As-salamu alaykum
Thank you for your kind responses and wisdom to assist Ursimmy. I am hopeful that you have assisted him greatly / sufficiently, God willing.
Regards,
Joseph