Peace brother.
You're just 14, and you seem to have the fear more than a lot of people who have claimed to be in submission to the god for 30, 40, 50 years. The fear is good. God tells us a lot about the people that fear Him, essentially that if you fear him He'll be by your side, and'll guide you to a path in which He'll be pleased with you, and you with Him. I'm unsure, but I don't think it should make you depressed, or too anxious that you can't do things anymore, but I haven't quite figured out myself how to handle it either.
You're doing the right thing by approaching these difficult topics head on, it's the only way to get past them, and when you do your connection with your god will increase significantly. You don't want them to pile up, because if they do it might seem impossible to overcome, or just not worth it. As for it completely taking over your mind, that's great, it's the connection with god that matters most, right? Once you've went through the words of your Lord a few times though it'll slow down, and wont be so overwelming, and you'll beable to get back to a lot of your activities, although you probably wont spend nearly as much time on them. Also you'll likely get different things from them, outside of just entertainment. I think it's still important to have that part of your life, where your exposed to society and how it is, to have a balance of mind, so that you don't become delusional, and so that you can see how much god has truly given you, and how much you should be grateful.
The variations between Hafs and Warsh are fairly insignificant, they usually just cause pronounciation changes, and hence change who it was talking about, changing meanings like "dont you know God knows whats in the hearts of people" to "don't they know God knows what's in the hearts of people", although I do think (I seek forgiveness if I incorrect about this) there are a few where the word is entirely different, though a synonym of the word, like say "he pardoned her" instead of "he forgived her". I don't think it is ever more significant than that with these two variations. These variations can also be attributed to scribal errors. I know I make mistakes constantly when trying to copy things word for word. As for why our god allowed this to happen? We can only speculate, but I think you can take it as a trial of the heart. And you'll have a lot of these throughout you life. I knew nothing about god, or this book I now hold dear to my heart until less than two years ago, and I assure you it feels like every month I hit a point where I am like "well that's it, how can I get past this" then within a short time God reassures my heart and it becomes stronger and stronger.
Now besides the Hafs and Warsh transmissions, there are many variations out there — I'm unsure if anyone really uses them though — that do have more significant variations, entire sentences, or paragraphs changed, and the likes of that. However noone really deems them significant, and they aren't really accessible in English because noone cares to even translate them. It would be difficult to obtain them even in Arab countries. Therefore I don't think those hold much credibility. Anyone can copy out a book and write in little additions, which is likely what happened with those.
As for the anchient manuscripts, a lot I think have again these small variations that you see between Hafs and Warsh, however some seem to be very close to, if not exactly the same as those we have today. I didn't mean to frighten you yesterday with what I said, I just meant to provide you with correct answers. And it is the truth that you can find many manuscripts that include variations. If your interested, last night I went through some of the Tübingen manuscript, it is one of the oldest, and very close to Muhammads time, it might even have been written by a companion of Muhammad, and I have yet to find any issues. It doesn't have taskeel though, so really I don't expect to see very many, if any. I'll update you again on that once I am finished the comparison. As I stated though, I am fairly new to all of this myself. I'm not very good with Arabic, so it'll take a little while to get through it.
And I'm sorry if I seemed like I was beating around any bushes, when I asked you to elaborate I just wasn't sure what you wanted, and I felt like people were repeating themselves, so I wanted you to be more specific. I truly would like to help you get through this. If it's a list of variations you need, translated to English, then I'll do my best to provide it to you, god willing, but it'll take a while, likely at least a few months. And I'm sorry for my question of what made you know the book is from the god, I didn't realise you were so young, or new to this all, and I just wanted to push you to realise that the reasons you believe in it, or at least some of them haven't changed. As you learn more you'll have more and more reasons that you know it to be from god, and things like the variations between Hafs and Warsh won't but be like a flick on the arm.
If I can help you further with anything, I'll try my best.
Peace be upon you brother.
PS. If you can learn Arabic, it'll open a lot of doors for you, even if it's just how to read and write the Arabic script. Once you can read it you'll pick up a lot just from here and there in your studies.
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