Help me explain to Christians the "difficult issues" concerning Muhammad

Started by Zack, January 27, 2014, 10:18:31 AM

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Zack

As you would be aware, there are a few stumbling blocks in Christians embracing a more positive view of Muhammad. I genuinely ask these questions so to seek an adequate answer. Responses that could help could be such things as a) Providing evidence that the particular action was not considered a sinful act in that era b) Evidence that the basis for that information is highly doubtful. c) This action was a sinful act, and Muhammad repented afterwards. (This is a valid response based on the Torah actions of Prophets)   . I noted on the article on Aisha that as it is not in the Quran, it is not something responded to. I understand the Quran focus, however this would be considered bypassing the real issue by most.

The stumbling blocks could include:

- Sexual morality: In particular the apparent marriage to Aisha at an age unacceptably young (8 yrs old?) age. Other issues with excessive number of wives.
- Cases of raids and murder.. Etc.

What are the biggest issues you can think of, and how do you respond? Again, I am asking this to give a valid response, not to be negative. If this is not a valid discussion, I am happy for it to be deleted....

Wasalam
Daniel

AbbsRay

Salaam Daniel,

Here is an article about that subjects.

- Sexual morality: In particular the apparent marriage to Aisha at an age unacceptably young (8 yrs old?) age. Other issues with excessive number of wives.

http://quransmessage.com/articles/ayesha%20age%20FM3.htm

Anyone who fully reads, studies and understands the Quran will know right away, whether Muslim or non Muslim, That Prophet Muhammad followed Gods revaluation, Allah did say about him that he is a man with high morals.


What still shocks me is Muslims believing what is in the Hadith about their prophet. I myself at a very young age, never believed such stories because it did not make sense someone in contact with God and given his revaluations would be anything but with high morals and character marrying a child.


God knows who He was going to choose to be His prophets and messengers way before they were born, i.e, Prophets were mentioned in the Torah such as Jesus, by Moses and he was not even born.  God certainly is not going to have a prophet who is going to reveal his final revaluations who Allah sees in the future time going to be married to a child or blood killing mad man.

As for multiple wives, I have not seen anything in the Quran that indicates he had multiple wives, Hadith is all fabrication so I never quote that and only an insane person, whether Muslim or not would use that as a religion source or any believes to it.

http://quransmessage.com/articles/prophet's%20wives%20FM3.htm

The verse 4:34 in the Quran Al Nisa talks about polygamy, but that verse by many is so misunderstood and people think that Polygamy is accepted by God. Only in circumstances.

http://quransmessage.com/articles/four%20wives%20FM3.htm

http://quransmessage.com/forum/forum.htm

I see it this way, If there is no mention in the Quran, there is no way anyone is going to know. People can assume and say many things, Muslim or nonmuslim, it does not mean it is true unless they fully read and understand the Quran, being that it is in the Quran.


- Cases of raids and murder.. Etc.

quransmessage.com/pdfs/Overlap%20Hadith%20and%20History.pdf

There are many many more if you do a search.
I do not see anything wrong with you asking. I see the nastiest stuff about Prophet Muhammad prophet Jesus the most that is so vile on You Tube, but it does not bother me, because I know the truth, I educate people, than everyone starts attacking each other.
I do see a lot about Prophet Muhammad on Christian websites. Once I start reading it, I get what the theme is, and it is not about is it true or not, it is attacking Islam as a whole. Those are usually fundamental Christians or extremely threatened people of  Islam because it is fastly increasing and many Christian's convert to Christianity.


I actually hear so much about Judaism more than Islam or about the same. I just say people need to educate themselves about their own religion before they start criticizing others in a negative matter.


Hope this helps....

AbbsRay


adam

Dear Daniel,

I may not be worthy of answering your questions. But from my 7 or 8 years researching about islam, i came to a conclusion that it is pointless taking stories of Muhammad from sources other than the quran as legitimate. First, one has to study historical islam and how all those hadiths attributed to the prophet came to be.

To do a study on the evolution of Islam we need to break down this evolutionary process into many periods.

The purest form of islam came during the first 4 caliphs after muhammad's death. There were no man made insertions or stories attributed to him at this time.

Do read an article from the link below, maybe you will find it helpful.

http://www.malaysia-today.net/islam-was-a-process-of-evolution/

AbbsRay

Salaam Danial

Here is some stuff I read the other day.. I have no idea how these people got this information about the Prophet but it is very true in my opnion by reading the Quran although not much is said about him. If anyone was to say this about Prophet Moses, Jesus, Noah... I would believe it as well. God chooses the best to represent and teach his revalations...


How is it that Prophet Muhammad was ranked no.1 in the top 100 influential people in history?


The 100: A Ranking of the Most Influential Persons in History is a 1978 book by Michael H. Hart, reprinted in 1992 with revisions. It is a ranking of the 100 people who, according to Hart, most influenced human history.[1]

The first person on Hart's list is the Prophet of Islam Muhammad.[2] Hart asserted that Muhammad was "supremely successful" in both the religious and secular realms. He also believed that Muhammad's role in the development of Islam was far more influential than Jesus' collaboration in the development of Christianity. He attributes the development of Christianity to St. Paul, who played a pivotal role in its dissemination.


What famous non-Muslims said about Islam and Prophet Muhammad PBUH

Napoleon Bonaparte


I hope the time is not far off when I shall be able to unite all the wise and educated men of all the countries and establish a uniform regime based on the principles of Quran which alone are true and which alone can lead men to happiness.



Sir George Bernard Shaw


I have always held the religion of Muhammad in high estimation because of its wonderful vitality. It is the only religion which appears to me to possess that assimilating capacity to the changing phase of existence which can make itself appeal to every age. I have studied him - the wonderful man and in my opinion far from being an anti-Christ, he must be called the Saviour of Humanity.

I believe that if a man like him were to assume the dictatorship of the modern world he would succeed in solving its problems in a way that would bring it the much needed peace and happiness: I have prophesied about the faith of Muhammad that it would be acceptable to the Europe of tomorrow as it is beginning to be acceptable to the Europe of today.



H.G. Wells


The Islamic teachings have left great traditions for equitable and gentle dealings and behaviour, and inspire people with nobility and tolerance. These are human teachings of the highest order and at the same time practicable. These teachings brought into existence a society in which hard-heartedness and collective oppression and injustice were the least as compared with all other societies preceding it... Islam is replete with gentleness, courtesy, and fraternity.



Phillip Hitti


During all the first part of the Middle Ages, no other people made as important a contribution to human progress as did the Arabs, if we take this term to mean all those whose mother-tongue was Arabic, and not merely those living in the Arabian peninsula. For centuries, Arabic was the language of learning, culture and intellectual progress for the whole of the civilized world with the exception of the Far East. From the 9th to the 12th century there were more philosophical, medical, historical, religious, astronomical and geographical works written in Arabic than in any other human tongue.



R. Bosworth Smith


He was Caesar and Pope in one; but he was Pope without Pope's pretensions, Caesar without the legions of Caesar: without a standing army, without a bodyguard, without a palace, without a fixed revenue; if ever any man had the right to say that he ruled by the right divine, it was Mohammed, for he had all the power without its instruments and without its supports. He cared not for the dressings of power. The simplicity of his private life was in keeping with his public life.



Sarojini Naidu


It was the first religion that preached and practised democracy; for, in the mosque, when the call for prayer is sounded and worshippers are gathered together, the democracy of Islam is embodied five times a day when the peasant and king kneel side by side and proclaim: 'God Alone is Great'



Dr. William Draper


Four years after the death of Justinian, A.D. 569, was born in Mecca, in Arabia, the man who, of all men, has exercised the greatest influence upon the human race... To be the religious head of many empires, to guide the daily life of one-third of the human race, may perhaps justify the title of a Messenger of God.



Thomas Carlyle


The lies (Western slander) which well-meaning zeal has heaped round this man (Muhammad) are disgraceful to ourselves only.

A silent great soul, one of that who cannot but be earnest. He was to kindle the world, the world's Maker had ordered so.



A. S. Tritton


The picture of the Muslim soldier advancing with a sword in one hand and the Qur'an in the other is quite false.



De Lacy O'Leary


History makes it clear, however, that the legend of fanatical Muslims sweeping through the world and forcing Islam at the point of sword upon conquered races is one of the most fantastically absurd myths that historians have ever repeated.



Gibbon


The good sense of Muhammad despised the pomp of royalty. The Apostle of God submitted to the menial offices of the family; he kindled the fire; swept the floor; milked the ewes; and mended with his own hands his shoes and garments. Disdaining the penance and merit of a hermit, he observed without effort of vanity the abstemious diet of an Arab.



Edward Gibbon and Simon Oakley


The greatest success of Mohammad's life was effected by sheer moral force.



Edward Montet


Islam is a religion that is essentially rationalistic in the widest sense of this term considered etymologically and historically... the teachings of the Prophet, the Qur'an has invariably kept its place as the fundamental starting point, and the dogma of unity of God has always been proclaimed therein with a grandeur a majesty, an invariable purity and with a note of sure conviction, which it is hard to find surpassed outside the pale of Islam... A creed so precise, so stripped of all theological complexities and consequently so accessible to the ordinary understanding might be expected to possess and does indeed possess a marvellous power of winning its way into the consciences of men.



Mahatma Gandhi


I wanted to know the best of the life of one who holds today an undisputed sway over the hearts of millions of mankind... I became more than ever convinced that it was not the sword that won a place for Islam in those days in the scheme of life. It was the rigid simplicity, the utter self-effacement of the Prophet the scrupulous regard for pledges, his intense devotion to his friends and followers, his intrepidity, his fearlessness, his absolute trust in God and in his own mission. These and not the sword carried everything before them and surmounted every obstacle. When I closed the second volume (of the Prophet's biography), I was sorry there was not more for me to read of that great life.



Alphonse de LaMartaine


If greatness of purpose, smallness of means, and astounding results are the three criteria of human genius, who could dare to compare any great man in modern history with Muhammad? The most famous men created arms, laws and empires only. They founded, if anything at all, no more than material powers which often crumbled away before their eyes. This man moved not only armies, legislations, empires, peoples and dynasties, but millions of men in one-third of the then inhabited world; and more than that, he moved the altars, the gods, the religions, the ideas, the beliefs and souls... the forbearance in victory, his ambition, which was entirely devoted to one idea and in no manner striving for an empire; his endless prayers, his mystic conversations with God, his death and his triumph after death; all these attest not to an imposture but to a firm conviction which gave him the power to restore a dogma. This dogma was twofold, the unit of God and the immateriality of God; the former telling what God is, the latter telling what God is not; the one overthrowing false gods with the sword, the other starting an idea with words.

"Philosopher, orator, apostle, legislator, warrior, conqueror of ideas, restorer of rational dogmas, of a cult without images; the founder of twenty terrestrial empires and of one spiritual empire, that is Muhammad. As regards all standards by which human greatness may be measured, we may well ask, is there any man greater than he?.



Michael Hart


My choice of Muhammad to lead the list of the world's most influential persons may surprise some readers and may be questioned by others, but he was the only man in history who was supremely successful on both the secular and religious level.

...It is probable that the relative influence of Muhammad on Islam has been larger than the combined influence of Jesus Christ and St. Paul on Christianity. .

..It is this unparalleled combination of secular and religious influence which I feel entitles Muhammad to be considered the most influential single figure in human history.



Rodwell


Mohammad's career is a wonderful instance of the force and life that resides in him who possesses an intense faith in God and in the unseen world. He will always be regarded as one of those who have had that influence over the faith, morals and whole earthly life of their fellow men, which none but a really great man ever did, or can exercise; and whose efforts to propagate a great verity will prosper.



W. Montgomery Watt


His readiness to undergo persecution for his beliefs, the high moral character of the men who believed in him and looked up to him as a leader, and the greatness of his ultimate achievement - all argue his fundamental integrity. To suppose Muhammad an impostor raises more problems that it solves. Moreover, none of the great figures of history is so poorly appreciated in the West as Muhammad...

Thus, not merely must we credit Muhammad with essential honesty and integrity of purpose, if we are to understand him at all; if we are to correct the errors we have inherited from the past, we must not forget the conclusive proof is a much stricter requirement than a show of plausibility, and in a matter such as this only to be attained with difficulty.



D. G. Hogarth in 'Arabia'


Serious or trivial, his daily behaviour has instituted a canon which millions observe this day with conscious memory. No one regarded by any section of the human race as Perfect Man has ever been imitated so minutely.The conduct of the founder of Christianity has not governed the ordinary life of his followers. Moreover, no founder of a religion has left on so solitary an eminence as the Muslim apostle.



Washington Irving


He was sober and abstemious in his diet and a rigorous observer of fasts. He indulged in no magnificence of apparel, the ostentation of a petty mind; neither was his simplicity in dress affected but a result of real disregard for distinction from so trivial a source.

In his private dealings he was just. He treated friends and strangers, the rich and poor, the powerful and weak, with equity, and was beloved by the common people for the affability with which he received them, and listened to their complaints.

His military triumphs awakened no pride nor vain glory, as they would have done had they been effected for selfish purposes. In the time of his greatest power he maintained the same simplicity of manners and appearance as in the days of his adversity. So far from affecting a regal state, he was displeased if, on entering a room, any unusual testimonials of respect were shown to him. If he aimed at a universal dominion, it was the dominion of faith; as to the temporal rule which grew up in his hands, as he used it without ostentation, so he took no step to perpetuate it in his family.



James Michener


No other religion in history spread so rapidly as Islam. The West has widely believed that this surge of religion was made possible by the sword. But no modern scholar accepts this idea, and the Qur'an is explicit in the support of the freedom of conscience.



Michael H. Hart, The 100: A Ranking of the Most Influential Persons in History

My choice of Muhammad to lead the world's most influential persons may surprise some readers and may be questioned by others, but he was the only man in history who was supremely successful on both the religious and secular levels. . .
. . . it may initially seem strange that Muhammad has been ranked higher than Jesus. There are two principal reasons for that decision. First, Muhammad played a far more important role to the development of Islam than Jesus did in the development of Christianity. Although Jesus was responsible for the main ethical and moral precepts of Christianity (insofar as these differed from Judaism), St. Paul was the main developer of Christian theology, its principal proselytizer, and the author of a large portion of the New Testament.

Muhammad, however, was responsible for both the theology of Islam and its main ethical and moral principles. In addition he played a key role in proselytizing the new faith, and in establishing the religious practices of Islam. Moreover, he is the author of the Moslem holy scriptures, the Koran. [The Quran, Muslims believe, is the revealed Word of God.]

Furthermore, Muhammad (unlike Jesus) was a secular leader as well as a religious leader. In fact as the driving force behind the Arab conquests, he may well rank as the most influential political leader of all time. . . [When Muhammad died in 632, he was the effective leader of all of southern Arabia. By 711, Arab armies had swept completely across North Africa to the Atlantic Ocean. In a scant century of fighting, the Bedouin tribesmen, inspired by the word of the Prophet, had carved out an empire stretching from the borders of India to the Atlantic Ocean -- the largest empire that the world had yet seen.]

. . the Arab conquests of the seventh century have continued to play an important role in human history, down to the present day. It is this unparalleled combination of secular and religious influence which I feel entitles Muhammad to be considered the most influential single figure in human history.

Alphonse de Lamartine, Histoire de la Turquie

Never has a man set for himself, voluntarily or involuntarily, a more sublime aim, since this aim was superhuman: to subvert superstitions which had been interposed between man and his creator, to render God unto man and man unto God; to restore the rational and sacred idea of divinity amidst the chaos of the material and disfigured gods of idolatry, then existing. Never has a man undertaken a work so far beyond human power with so feeble means, for he (Muhammad) had in the conception as well as in the execution of such a great design no other instrument than himself, and no other aid, except a handful of men living in a corner of the desert. Finally, never has a man accomplished such a huge and lasting revolution in the world, because in less than two centuries after its appearance, Islam, in faith and in arms, reigned over the whole of Arabia, and conquered, in God's name, Persia, Khorasan, Transoxania, Western India, Syria, Egypt, Abyssinia, all the known continent of Northern Africa, numerous islands of the Mediterranean, Spain, and a part of Gaul.
If greatness of purpose, smallness of means, and astounding results are the true criteria of human genius, who could dare to compare any great man in modern history with Muhammad? The most famous men created arms, laws and empires only. They founded, if anything at all, no more than material powers which often crumbled away before their eyes. This man moved not only armies, legislations, empires, peoples and dynasties, but millions of men in one-third of the inhabited world; and more than that, he moved the altars, the gods, the religions, the ideas, the beliefs and the souls.

On the basis of a Book, every letter of which has become law, he created a spiritual nationality which blended together peoples of every tongue and of every race. He has left us as the indelible characteristic of this Muslim nationality the hatred of false gods and the passion for the One and Immaterial God. This avenging patriotism against the profanation of Heaven formed the virtue of the followers of Muhammad; the conquest of one-third of the earth to his dogma was his miracle; or rather it was not the miracle of a man but that of reason.

The idea of the Unity of God, proclaimed amidst the exhaustion of fabulous theogonies, was in itself such a miracle that upon its utterance from his lips it destroyed all the ancient temples of idols and set on fire one-third of the world. His life, his meditations, his heroic revilings against the superstitions of his country, and his boldness in defying the furies of idolatry, his firmness in enduring them for fifteen years at Mecca, his acceptance of the role of public scorn and almost of being a victim of his fellow countrymen: all these and, finally, his flight, his incessant preaching, his wars against odds, his faith in his success and his superhuman security in misfortune, his forbearance in victory, his ambition, which was entirely devoted to one idea and in no manner striving for an empire; his endless prayers, his mystic conversations with God, his death and his triumph after death: all these attest not to an imposture but to affirm conviction which gave him the power to restore a dogma. This dogma was twofold, the unity of God and the immateriality of God: the former telling what God is, the latter telling what God is not; the one overthrowing false gods with the sword, the other starting an idea with the words.

Philosopher, orator, apostle, legislator, warrior, conqueror of ideas, restorer of rational dogmas, of a cult without images; the founder of twenty terrestrial empires and of one spiritual empire, that is Muhammad. As regards all standards by which human greatness may be measured, we may well ask, is there any man greater than he? -- Paris 1854, Vol. II, pp. 276- 277

Zack

Quote from: Abbsrayray on January 27, 2014, 12:35:25 PM
Salaam Daniel,

Here is an article about that subjects.

http://quransmessage.com/articles/ayesha%20age%20FM3.htm

What still shocks me is Muslims believing what is in the Hadith about their prophet. I myself at a very young age, never believed such stories because it did not make sense someone in contact with God and given his revaluations would be anything but with high morals and character marrying a child.

As for multiple wives, I have not seen anything in the Quran that indicates he had multiple wives, Hadith is all fabrication so I never quote that and only an insane person, whether Muslim or not would use that as a religion source or any believes to it.

http://quransmessage.com/articles/prophet's%20wives%20FM3.htm

The verse 4:34 in the Quran Al Nisa talks about polygamy, but that verse by many is so misunderstood and people think that Polygamy is accepted by God. Only in circumstances.

http://quransmessage.com/articles/four%20wives%20FM3.htm

http://quransmessage.com/forum/forum.htm

I see it this way, If there is no mention in the Quran, there is no way anyone is going to know. People can assume and say many things, Muslim or nonmuslim, it does not mean it is true unless they fully read and understand the Quran, being that it is in the Quran.

- Cases of raids and murder.. Etc.

quransmessage.com/pdfs/Overlap%20Hadith%20and%20History.pdf

Hope this helps....

I feel that a response basically "If it is not in the Qur'an, then it is not true" will not help in giving a reasoned response to inquirers, in seeking a greater acceptance of Muhammad by non-Muslims. This response may be a valid response to people treating extra-quranic accounts as divine revelation , however we are dealing with history, not divine revelation.  If that logic was used, we could deny all sorts of historical factual details concerning both Islam and Christianity.

To deny the occurring of these issues when orthodoxy says otherwise, there needs to be a good historical reason for it to be brought into question.

Wasalam
Daniel

PS Adam. I read the article, it seems quite negative concerning the Abbasid period, when in fact it was the most stable and prosperous period for the Arab world. I have no doubt that Islam evolved dramatically after the Caliphs, however there still needs to be a stronger basis for response concerning the actions of Muhammad, particularly that he did not practice polygamy. Personally Polygamy for that era in Arabia is not one of the major issues. It is clearly practiced in the Torah in certain periods.

adam

Dear Danial,

This may not be applicable to all, but i personally feel that the fact that we have the quran today is sufficient in one's faith towards God, his angels, prophets, his books and the last day. what muhammad did in his personal time, who he married etc will not help me as a believer. Historical accounts are not valid in portraying a certain person or event. So, Stories about prophets that are based on verbal accounts are nullified. Our duty as human beings is to keep hold to God's messages and law.

Salam

adam

Additionally,

It is obvious, that by idolizing our prophet, we end up lost and further from tauhid. Most muslims need to dress and behave like the prophet based on sayings in the hadith just to think that they are pious people. What an intelligent way for the devil to infiltrate the faith. by using the prophet and his so called sayings and actions. Iblees does not have to convince mankind that God does not exist, In fact, Iblees advocates that God does exist, and he has a religion. thus, all this different types of religions sprout out from nowhere. and all fight to be called the actual religion of God. at this point, Iblees' job is done and he only has to look at how humans fight each other in the name of God and religion.

If we just focus on the quran, we wont run far from truth. and if we dont know certain details from the past(not mentioned in the quran) there is no need to look for it elsewhere, it wont benefit us and our faith towards God, if the quran wasnt sufficient in the first place.


Salam

Joseph Islam

Dear brother Daniel / All,

As-salam alaykum

The prophet had more than one wife at one time which is absolutely clear from verses of the Quran. For example:

033.059 (part)
"O Prophet! Tell thy wives (ajwajika) and thy daughters..."

This is also clear from another verse, where one wife divulged a matter to another individual.

066:001 (part)
"...seeking to please your wives (azwajika)..."

However, as I respectfully shared in a response today in another thread, "Criticism of the Quran or the prophet from the context of late fallible sources is also wholly unwarranted." [1]

My own humble academic studies have been just as intense with the Ahadith corpus as they have been with the Quran, and it is the lack of credibility and authenticity of historicity where the problem ultimately lies when these sources are taken as 'fact'.

The Quran simply remains the earliest, most reliable historical source of the Prophet's ministry.

Any sincere enquirer whether Christian or otherwise, must be willing to put the sources that they are being informed by - from where they form an opinion, to a credibility test. This may require a scholarly approach or a cursory one, but nevertheless, this test needs to be conducted with utmost sincerity.

I was once an ardent critic of Muhammad's ministry. But it was through a sincere academic, ardent enquiry that I realised the truth of the Quran and the socio-political context through which the Ahadith corpus found provenance. I was clearly able to separate the two and recognise 'Muhammad' as a bona fide 'prophet' of God. I can only urge that others attempt to understand the sources for themselves to ascertain truth, God willing.

For example, I ask the question in my article relating to 'Ayesha's' alleged child age of marriage as thus:

"The question remains, would a Prophet of God go against the very revelations that were given to him? Or are the narrations found in the Islamic secondary sources falsely or incorrectly attributed?" [2]

This is not a question of brushing the matter of 'Ayesha's' alleged age of marriage aside. In my humble view, this is a sincere, cogent academic question which asks the reader (Traditional Muslim or otherwise) what is the most authentic source for enquiry? The Quran (a source contemporaneous to the prophet's life) or reports from late fallible sources [3]?

I hope that helps, God willing.
Joseph


REFERENCES:

[1] The danger of the "Qur'an only" Approach
http://quransmessage.com/forum/index.php?topic=1123.msg4728#msg4728
[2] WAS AYESHA REALLY A CHILD BRIDE? - MARRIAGEABLE AGE FROM THE QURAN
http://quransmessage.com/articles/ayesha%20age%20FM3.htm
[3] Dr. FAUQ, A, Did Sayyida Ayesha (ra) Marry Muhammad (pbuh), The Prophet of Islam at Age 6?
http://quransmessage.com/forum/index.php?topic=104.msg262#msg262
'During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act' 
George Orwell

marealta

I was also struggling about the issue of 'immoral sexuality' and the image of 'war prophet'. It took me about four months to understand.

What made me understand Prophet's marriage to Aisha, even from secondary sources, is the accepted fact that Prophet Muhammad remained monogamous with his older wife (who was a widow) up until her death.

His wives after the first one were mostly widows, and the marriages were done for cementing relationship between tribes, taking care of friend's widow, freeing war hostage (elevating her status); for the sake of the early Islam community. Aisha was the only virgin he married, and she was his best friend's daughter. If it was a controversial thing, the disbelievers would have criticized that marriage and used it against Muhammad, but they did not. Thus, it was acceptable.

Arabs at that time did not celebrate birthday, it was not the culture. The eligibility of a marriage in the culture was puberty, not the age. I think the very climate and condition of the area plus the body figure of Arabs in general should also be taken into consideration, it probably have something to do with body development.

Aisha later became a prominent Islamic leader, despite being a woman. And even from the Hadith, she is portrayed as a very awesome woman. What came in my mind, is the one that tells her having a running race with Muhammad. Although there are also unnecessary silly detailed one saying that Aisha and Muhammad liked to have a bath in the same place (or something like that). 

It is probably good to tell your respective Christian fellows that our people long ago did marry young too. And even in many countries, and also states in the U.S., the marriage age is as low as teens. It is also good I think, to look back into the Old Testament, maybe they haven't read about the wars in the name of God of Israel? Or polygamy existing in the Bible? King Solomon did have multiple wives and concubines. Help them to understand the context of the Middle Eastern of that time. I have also read a Bible Commentary saying that Joseph was around 90 years old and Mary was in her teens, when they were married.

Introducing Judaism set of beliefs also help! It is very similar to Islam. Well, of course it is.

As for the image of 'war prophet', the so called wars were done also for the sake of Islam. The plurality value of Islam back in that day was that 'to you my religion, to me mine'. The spirit of Islam was not to convert all of the pagans. But if a certain people did not want to convert, they also should not disturb and persecute the Muslims.

Remind your friends that even Moses ordered the killing of a pagan community, it is there in the Old Testament.

One good saying attributed to the war moral in Islam is that when a war is done, the army should not destroy any tree, any innocent, children, women, and elderly. A fight in the name of Islam should be done as a defensive one, not as an offensive one.

About Hadith, well, I see Muhammad as a man, so he would have a personality, he would have a preference of like and dislikes. What happened, I think, was that people were so obsessed in trivial details regarding the Prophets like/dislike and the history of his personal life, something that is not relevant to his tasks: delivering the message of Quran and establishing Islamic community. This is good thing to be simply explained too. And also the way Hadith were transmitted...

marealta

It is also good, I think, to explain a brief history about Medina Charter and The Covenant of the Prophet Muhammad with the Monks of Mount Sinai...

Many people are opposed to a religion not because the religion, but because the behavior of those practicing the religion. But I always try to tell myself, a quote that was introduced by a friend:

"Get to know the truth, then you would know the people of truth.
Truth is not measured by its men, but men are measured by their truth."
- Ali bin Abi Thalib