Salaam,
The words you mention are Greek and are are matter of debate in the academic world, with some people equating the two and the majority saying that they have a distinct difference.
Hupotassomai:
yielding or submitting either to a person in authority or to wise counsel.
Agapao:
to welcome, to entertain, to be fond of, to love dearly of things,to be well pleased, to be contented at or with a thing
The key here is that the system of marriage had a hierarchical structure that was conveyed through the use of these words. A husband would be incomplete without the support of his wife but ultimately he was the head of the household.
So her submission (Hupotassomai) would be in this context and not as a child who is told what to do and when to do it. At the same time, a husband is to love (Agapao) and care for his wife because she is his valued companion.
I think that we will have to understand the hierarchical significance that is alluded to in the Bible and also the Quran when is comes to the positions of spouses.